Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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