i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
