You're completely useless in the revolution.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
and you fell through a lawn chair
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize