Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
