I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
