what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
My day in three words: secret purse cake
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Randomize
