we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
