I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
