I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
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