idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
