OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Randomize
