Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
