Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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