I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Semen is not good for contacts.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
