Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Randomize
