i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
