I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
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