Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
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