She said her name was "party"
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
