you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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