real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
