Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
Randomize
