Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize
