If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Randomize
