thus making me awesome and them whores
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Randomize
