What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Randomize
