why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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