Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
