I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
They are going to name an STD after you.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
