Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
