found the other keg... it's in the tree
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
you're hired as official boob wrangler
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
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