Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
