Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Randomize
