these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
I party with great urgency now.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
