i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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