so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
