well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize