I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
True but thats because hes a fetus.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Randomize
