All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize