i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize