just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
