these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
