just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Randomize
