I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize
