great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Randomize