if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
