Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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