doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
