i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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