I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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